Shahid Kapoor has been in Bollywood since he looked like a little boy to now when he looks like a man-child. In other words, he’s been in the public eye long enough to know that celebrities should think many times before opening their mouths and speaking their minds. You think Shahid would have advised his wife to keep her opinions to herself, just to be the wiser. But no, that didn’t happen. Most likely since Shahid has been banking on his marriage, his baby wife and his actual baby to stay in the news. As for his wife, Mira Rajput/Kapoor, no one can deny that she has enjoyed the goodwill that everyone has sent her way since she made her debut as Shahid Kapoor’s wife on Koffee with Karan. But, who knew that the goodwill was only going to last to the day Mira decided to share her opinions on being a stay at home mom. It was meant to be her opinion, as a new mom, which somehow turned into this huge debate that subsequently brought a lot of backlash her way. See, when someone is voicing their opinion, you may agree or disagree. But what you can’t do, is prove how wrong they are because it’s their opinion. In a way, it’s their freedom of speech and their right to say what they want. But, Mira is considered a celebrity due to her connection to a Bollywood star. So, she should have probably thought well before sharing her very honest opinions regarding motherhood.

In Response to Kareena Kapoor

In some ways, many people are saying how Mira said all those things in response to the crap Kareena Kapoor has been saying about being pregnant and being a mother. If that was truly Mira’s intention, then it was childish and this whole thing of giving a piece of her mind to her husband’s ex backtracked heavily for her. Shahid even denied that all this was aimed at Kareena. Now that he has said it out loud, it could be that Mira was targetting Kareena.

The Backlash

Since her speech Mira has had to deal with the countless of women, who wrote essays and open letters rejecting her opinions. The latest is a batchmate of hers from college, who decided to share in an open post on Facebook how Mira looked down on others in college. To be fair, college-goers do behave differently while in college compared to how they behave in life after college. But maybe this girl was affected by Mira’s behaviour, which is why she shared what she did.

Mira Rajput’s Background

To be honest, from the time it was announced that Shahid Kapoor was going to marry a girl more than 10 years younger than him, a lot of opinions already poured out regarding his situation. Here’s what we thought then. When the announcement was made, Mira’s achievements was put out or shared. There were quite a few good ones for someone as young as her. Our thought then was why would someone, whose parents have invested so much in her, opt to marry a senior not-that-educated actor? Was there no other option for her? Why study this much, get a degree, do volunteer work at the UN and yet, you end up marrying the most controlling and narcissist bachelor in Bollywood? To be fair, it’s her life and she can do what she wants with it. But bear in mind that in India, so many girls can’t go to school and we would think that with someone that wanted to achieve something, probably they would have done more. Maybe, Shahid was all that Mira was looking for in life: someone, who makes enough money so that she can have no problem spending her time shopping and being a housewife. Now, she’s a young mother. It’s all good, if it wasn’t for the blind items that were released regarding his behaviour. In case you missed those, well, these blind items were talking about how Shahid still enjoyed himself outside the house while he keeps his wife inside. Even when he was engaged, he was still going around hoping to get something from some Bollywood single ladies. Who can forget about the shameless showing-off body pictures he shared on social media right before his engagement was announced. We won’t say more, but you get what these blind items were trying to indicate. That’s what’s sad about it.

Shahid Kapoor’s latest Filmfare Magazine cover

It’s a Drama

We didn’t want to share all this because it’s a delicate topic, but since it’s getting bigger and messier, we changed our mind. This whole thing has become a drama now, so we thought it is easier to just compile what has been said about this whole situation right here. It all started at a Women’s Day event hosted by Mid-Day, where Mira was invited to speak on marriage, motherhood, and feminism. Who in their right mind invited her to share her opinions? Was Jaya Bachchan not available?

You will find everything related to this whole drama below. There’s Mira’s comments that sparked this whole controversy, Shahid’s comments in her defence, women not agreeing with her and her batchmate’s remembering how Mira was in college.

Here’s what Mira said at an event celebrating International Women’s Day.

On feminism:

It’s my choice if I want to be at home, it’s someone else’s choice if they want to be a working woman. Feminism isn’t about man versus woman. It’s about equality. There’s a new wave of feminism that’s come which is about aggression. I feel it’s very destructive. I feel there should be a harmony between the two sexes. If either one of them tries to take the place of other, there will be chaos.

 

On being a proud homemaker:

I am a homemaker and wear that label with pride. I had a tough pregnancy. I went through those five months of difficult times to bring our daughter into this world. Now I want to spend every moment that I can with her. I think that there are some set of responsibilities on my plate and I feel at my age, I have a lot more energy. I have my future ahead of me, I can finish all my responsibilities and I have nothing in my way. I can raise my daughter, I can be a good wife and I can set my house the way I like. I love being at home and love my child. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I wouldn’t want to spend one hour with Misha and then rush off to work. Why did I have her? Misha is not a puppy. I want to be there for her. Seeing her grow can’t be quantified.

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Shahid Kapoor’s comments defending her:

I think she was speaking from a very positive space. I do understand that people have a strong point of view and people get hurt about things, but I think we are in a time where everybody is getting hurt about everything. So, I honestly don’t feel there is any sense in trying to keep everyone happy.

We are also in a time where anybody who is important or being given importance says something, a lot of people want to gain importance by saying something against them. So, we just live in that kind of a time.

I think Mira is speaking for a section of women who really aren’t being represented. There are times when those women feel that they should not be celebrated. By that I mean women who might not be doing a job, who might choose to be at home, have a baby, take care of the baby and consider that important enough to do at a certain stage in your life.

At a different stage of life, you might choose something else. I took five months off when I was having Misha (daughter) because I felt it was important for me to be with my wife and my child.

So that’s a choice you make out of a certain sense of independence. I think there are very few people showing any kind of appreciation towards these women.

I don’t think what a mother gives to her child is something that should not be appreciated. They should feel empowered and self-assured of the fact that they are extremely important and what they do is as important as any other job.

I personally feel that I might be the one who goes to work between me and Mira as husband and wife, but what she is doing for Misha is far more important, far more relevant. I really wish I could but between the two of us one has to go to work and I happen to be that person

Other Women voicing their opinions

Dear Mira Kapoor, Mothers Who Pursue Their Careers Don’t Think Their Babies Are ‘Puppies’

First, women all over the world leave their kids at home to go and work, and they don’t treat their children like ‘puppies.’ Other than the privilege that this statement reeks of, it also shows Mira’s skewed perception of a good parent. Women who start working soon after childbirth are just as capable of being amazing parents. Also, does this perception apply to Shahid as well? He was out and about promoting Rangoon soon after his child was born. By Mira’s definition of a good parent, shouldn’t a man also stay home to watch his child grow and not treat her “like a puppy”?

Yes, Mira, feminism is all about choice and not shaming people for their choices, but we thought you were smarter than someone who’d call anyone a “feminazi.” A Nazi is a member of the National Socialist German Workers’ Party, the people who gassed Jews, or were/are in favour of the same. Do you see the ‘new age feminists’ gassing people? No. So, please stop calling them Nazis. That term means something, and as a person of influence, you’re required to be more responsible. Secondly, FYI, it’s the new age feminists who fought for women like you to have the agency to come out and speak their minds. It was their “aggressive and destructive” behaviour that allowed women to choose. Also, what is wrong with being aggressive? Are only men allowed to be angry while talking about things that hold them back?

From Mira’s batchmate in college

Dear Mira,

Having watched your interview, I feel extremely enraged today. I’ve spent three years in the same college and batch as you. I can say today with confidence that your idea of feminism is extremely flawed. Seeing you walk around with your posse in college, belittling women who were not skinny enough or did not subscribe to your fashion standards’ makes me wonder what you ever did to have a moral high ground over anyone at any point. Your narrow world view is astounding, to say the least. And not to forget, how your statement about working mothers takes us years back in reaching actual empowerment of which you seem to know nothing.

With lots of aggression,

An informed feminist

On a side note, now that all of this has come out, Shahid Kapoor can finally stop talking about his marriage and start talking about the good films he will sign. In other words, he should rely on his talent more than on publicity.